Thursday, September 13, 2012

Observation Does Not Involve Judgment.

Observation Does Not Involve Judgment.

Observing something and making a judgment about it are two separate things. 

When we observe something.. for instance, how someone is dressed, or their posture, or the color of their skin, all we are doing is collecting data. During this process, there is no assessing, evaluating, interpreting, or judging. We are just noticing something exactly as it is. Like facts, these things are neither right or wrong, good or bad, better or worse. We are not making comparisons. We are just seeing what is there. Exactly as it is. No more, no less.

But, of course, we also judge and evaluate, and compare. It's just part and parcel of being human. We take that data and we reflect on it using previous experiences in an attempt to understand what it means. Of course, this will never allow us to know what it means. Because, at best, whatever we come up with will only be a speculation. Regardless, however, it is what we do. That's just the way the brain works. 

Of course, this does not mean we can't be aware of these two distinctions. Observing Something. And, evaluating something. 

But, what's the point of becoming aware of these two distinctions or being able to consciously distinguish one from the other, you might ask. Well, here's the thing... Not knowing that what you think about what you see is just that, a thought, not a fact, will limit you to responses only be based on an assumption. For example; Let's say a person is wearing clothing that in your estimation fits poorly. Maybe it's wrinkled and could use a good press. Or, it seems dated. If this is the case, you might conclude that this person lacks a certain standing, or maybe competence. If so, you may very well interact with this person on the basis of that assumption. In doing so, you may find you're interaction to cause some friction. Especially if that individual is not as you've assumed them to be. 

Being able to recognize your assessments about something or someone as distinct from the information you've collected by observation enables you to more consciously choose how you want to engage with them. And, often times, that will provide the opportunity to get to know more about that individual than you might have unknowingly thought you already knew. 

The quality of our relationships are often driven by assumptions we make about the other person. We often operate with those individuals as if we already know more about them than we really do. And, that may often leave the other person offended and hurt because it seems you don't know them at all or do not respect them for who they really are. We most likely do not see the arrogance that this represents. But, they will.

The work that I do with my clients involves learning to recognize such distinctions that, without awareness of, creates and perpetuates situations and relationships that fall short of our desires. Facts from interpretations. Feelings from thoughts. Emotions from actions. Mastering the ability to recognize these and other distinctions will give you the power to choose, act, and communicate in ways that produce greater satisfaction in your life. And, will empower your ability to be authentic and true in your relationships and the circumstances of your life. 

If you want to know more, you know where to find me.

Love,
Rj
TrueSelf.



Thursday, September 6, 2012

My Random Political Views On Current Issues

My Random Political Views On Current Issues 

I appreciate the ability to disagree without personal attacks and with people who, I believe like yourself, are for the most part open and receptive to opinions that differ from their own. I think that this is what's missing, not just in politics but within today's culture. And, while I believe our political figures today contribute to the rancor and hostility, the media's willingness to broadcast spin without helping the public decipher and actually investigate that spin, just reinforces this discourse. 

Unfortunately, we are a society of too few well informed citizens. We may be increasingly well educated, though these individuals still do not make up our majority. But, unfortunately, even the educational opportunities that do exist don't produce the well informed. But, that's a whole other issue that I think is sorely missing from today's political debate. The profound ineffectiveness of today's educational opportunities.

It was made clear from the moment Barack Obama took office what the
Republicans number one, overriding agenda was. And, that was to deny this President a second term. So, given this, how can anyone not consider that as the motivation behind every disagreement and block that they put in Obama's way? Really! I know many people see me as a liberal.. I am. But, I am also, at least in my opinion, pretty level headed. I remember back when John McCain was running against George Bush in the Republican primaries of 2000. He was his old maverick self. And, I genuinely considered giving him my vote should he have been nominated. He was rational. Made sense. Seemed genuinely independent in his reasoning. And expressed a deep understanding of the value of strengthening the middle class. But, even he has become a mouth piece for the right wingnuts. .....Sorry, the right wing. Though, I think of them as the wrong wing. OK. Enough..... It's mind boggling to me... it really is, as to why so many in the middle class, would compromise their own best interests to support Mitt Romney and his one-dimensional running mate. What I am left with thinking is that these people are not so much infatuated by Romney, after all why would they be, but more so by an anti-Obama gut driven attitude. With ever more certainty I believe racism is definitely one factor. Because when you exclude all the reasons why these individuals should support the only one of the two candidates who has consistently supported the causes of this group, what else is there to conclude. Call them closeted bigots.. or maybe they really can't see it themselves. But, c'mon.. what else could it be. The stronger the middle class, the more the wealthy benefit. The percentage of income the middle class spends in the market place is far larger than that of the '1 percenters'. And, that spending spurs the economy. A stronger wealthy class?... By all measures, In the eight years of the Bush administration the wealthiest Americans fared best.. And, what happened? Apparently these "job creators" must have been preoccupied with something else. Like squirrels, they socked away all that money. And, why would anyone expect them to do anything else? Where's the evidence that they will do anything other than what best serves themselves? And, while I understand that there's an argument to be had about why we should all have the right to do whatever we want with our hard earned money, many of these so called job creators have earned that money through questionable means that challenge ethics if not actual laws. And, why, in the name of sensibility, would we want a man who hides his income in foreign countries and conceals his taxes with a cavalier and prima donna attitude running this country? Is that really the example we want to lead us? Or for that matter, the criteria we want to use to justify this candidates nomination?.

Regarding immigration, I believe we must strive to for an enlightened approach. So that our society and it's ills can actually improve, moving us forward toward a better future. This outcome should be the context for any debate. The idea that we should just round up everyone, or as Romney has suggested "
Self Deportation", that America’s 11 million undocumented immigrants would simply go home if government made their lives miserable enough", is cruel and small minded. And, in no way would that provide an example of what we need more of in our culture, civility.

And, as for the Right's issues with Gay marriage and abortion, well I confess, I'm baffled. It's fascinating to me, really, how the Republicans can be the voice of a limiting government oversight and getting government out of our lives, yet at the same time proposing Federal laws to govern marriage and a woman's right to choose. Not to mention guns and capitol punishment.


I think what this President has been the worst at is keeping the public informed as to what he's done that has and will improve our circumstances and the reasoning he's employed in his process.


For me, there is so much hate and cruelty in our society and a lack of civility that while I may not agree with every decision being made on my behalf, I take into consideration where I believe the motivations come from. I don't think Romney is a bad man. But, I do think he is weak. John Kerry was measured by his flip flops, though I think in many cases unfairly. So, why shouldn't Mitt? And, there are many.

My Random Political Views On Current Issues



I appreciate the ability to disagree without personal attacks and with people who, I believe like yourself, are for the most part open and receptive to opinions that differ from their own. I think that this is what's missing, not just in politics but within today's culture. And, while I believe our political figures today contribute to the rancor and hostility, the media's willingness to broadcast spin without helping the public decipher and actually investigate that spin, just reinforces this discourse. 

Unfortunately, we are a society of too few well informed citizens. We may be increasingly well educated, though these individuals still do not make up our majority. But, unfortunately, even the educational opportunities that do exist don't produce the well informed. But, that's a whole other issue that I think is sorely missing from today's political debate. The profound ineffectiveness of today's educational opportunities.

It was made clear from the moment Barack Obama took office what the
Republicans number one, overriding agenda was. And, that was to deny this President a second term. So, given this, how can anyone not consider that as the motivation behind every disagreement and block that they put in Obama's way? Really! I know many people see me as a liberal.. I am. But, I am also, at least in my opinion, pretty level headed. I remember back when John McCain was running against George Bush in the Republican primaries of 2000. He was his old maverick self. And, I genuinely considered giving him my vote should he have been nominated. He was rational. Made sense. Seemed genuinely independent in his reasoning. And expressed a deep understanding of the value of strengthening the middle class. But, even he has become a mouth piece for the right wingnuts. .....Sorry, the right wing. Though, I think of them as the wrong wing. OK. Enough..... It's mind boggling to me... it really is, as to why so many in the middle class, would compromise their own best interests to support Mitt Romney and his one-dimensional running mate. What I am left with thinking is that these people are not so much infatuated by Romney, after all why would they be, but more so by an anti-Obama gut driven attitude. With ever more certainty I believe racism is definitely one factor. Because when you exclude all the reasons why these individuals should support the only one of the two candidates who has consistently supported the causes of this group, what else is there to conclude. Call them closeted bigots.. or maybe they really can't see it themselves. But, c'mon.. what else could it be. The stronger the middle class, the more the wealthy benefit. The percentage of income the middle class spends in the market place is far larger than that of the '1 percenters'. And, that spending spurs the economy. A stronger wealthy class?... By all measures, In the eight years of the Bush administration the wealthiest Americans fared best.. And, what happened? Apparently these "job creators" must have been preoccupied with something else. Like squirrels, they socked away all that money. And, why would anyone expect them to do anything else? Where's the evidence that they will do anything other than what best serves themselves? And, while I understand that there's an argument to be had about why we should all have the right to do whatever we want with our hard earned money, many of these so called job creators have earned that money through questionable means that challenge ethics if not actual laws. And, why, in the name of sensibility, would we want a man who hides his income in foreign countries and conceals his taxes with a cavalier and prima donna attitude running this country? Is that really the example we want to lead us? Or for that matter, the criteria we want to use to justify this candidates nomination?.

Regarding immigration, I believe we must strive to for an enlightened approach. So that our society and it's ills can actually improve, moving us forward toward a better future. This outcome should be the context for any debate. The idea that we should just round up everyone, or as Romney has suggested "
Self Deportation", that America’s 11 million undocumented immigrants would simply go home if government made their lives miserable enough", is cruel and small minded. And, in no way would that provide an example of what we need more of in our culture, civility.

And, as for the Right's issues with Gay marriage and abortion, well I confess, I'm baffled. It's fascinating to me, really, how the Republicans can be the voice of a limiting government oversight and getting government out of our lives, yet at the same time proposing Federal laws to govern marriage and a woman's right to choose. Not to mention guns and capitol punishment.


I think what this President has been the worst at is keeping the public informed as to what he's done that has and will improve our circumstances and the reasoning he's employed in his process.


For me, there is so much hate and cruelty in our society and a lack of civility that while I may not agree with every decision being made on my behalf, I take into consideration where I believe the motivations come from. I don't think Romney is a bad man. But, I do think he is weak. John Kerry was measured by his flip flops, though I think in many cases unfairly. So, why shouldn't Mitt? And, there are many.